When the Road gets Bumpy

bumpyroad

It was nineteen months ago my husband and I signed the dotted line on our adoption paperwork, committing to an international adoption. Little did we know just how much that commitment was going to change and challenge us.

When we first committed to our African adoption, we were told that the wait could be 12-14 months from start to finish. And yet we find ourselves in the thick of waiting for our daughters to come home with no clear picture of when that will actually happen.

I’ll be honest, I had hoped to have started writing and blogging about what life was like as we transitioned our family from 2 to 4 by now, but God has had different plans for our little family.

If I look hard enough (or really not that hard at all…) I can see the fingerprints of God all over our story as we continue to wait.

Over the course of these past 19 months we have seen our government change the way they process international adoptions (twice), our adopting country suspend important pieces of the adoption puzzle, the court system slllooow down, and translations having to be retranslated multiple times to make certain everything is perfect. Oh, and in the midst of it all, God saw fit to grant us a little miracle baby girl who entered this world a little over two months ago (talk about a surprise gift)!

The road to bringing home our children seems to get longer and more complicated as each month passes. We’ve grown weary, angry and down right pessimistic at times, but God has continued to bring us to a place of peace. We have learned so much about ourselves, the love of God, the fallen nature of man, and the spiritual warfare of adoption that I could write a book on it, but I won’t…at least not today! Instead, I want to share a few things that I’ve done to hold on to God while the adoption road keeps getting bumpier.

1) Write it down. Writing down each step, whether good or bad, and your feelings about that can help you think on what is true and remind you that God will take care of every detail. Buying a journal can be the cheapest form of therapy!

2) Set up monuments. We keep pictures of our daughters and African decorations up in our house to remind us to pray for them and for the governments that are making the important decisions that affect our adoption.

3) Keep truth in front of you. I have purchased prints and written scripture to put up on our walls to remind us of the faithfulness of God. Seeing truth every day encourages me, even on the hardest of days.

4) Surround yourself with community. Whether it be your online community, family, or church family, have people who are holding you up in prayer and listening to your heart as you walk this journey. It will help you from feeling lonely and discouraged.

5) Keep living your life. I know this one sounds weird, but it can be so easy to be completely consumed with your adoption that you lose sight on the life you are living right now. Even in the season of waiting there are things that God wants to do in and through you outside of your adoption. The pregnancy and birth of my daughter, Naomi, taught me that lesson.

6) Pray. God holds the hearts of every person in His hand and He is the only One who can change their hearts and minds (Prov. 21:1)

Most of all, know that you are not alone. God is there to be your comfort and your Rock. He has set you on this road, however bumpy it may get. And He will not leave you. He will not leave your children.

He is FOR you. He is FOR adoption. He is FOR the orphan.

This post was first published on the Mercy Found Ministry blog. If you are an adoptive parent in any stage of the process, this ministry desires to help you find community with other adoptive families.

Comments

  1. oh, friend. these words were a balm to my soul this morning. thank you so very much. beautiful .

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  1. […] I want to talk about it, I will bring it up. I have learned the best way to walk through this is to keep on living. Jason and I want to leave a legacy to our children to enjoy and embrace the life God has given […]

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