He’s Living Unplugged too…and writing more

My husband, Jason, chose to join up with me on this 31 days of living unplugged and he’s been using some of that time to stretch his writing muscles (he’s more often a photographer). Here is a post that he wrote on marriage (you can read it here too):

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Some Marriage Advice

10* things I’ve learned in my first 3ish years

My friend Ryan is getting married this weekend. So my wife and I were sitting around one night talking about their coming nuptials and she asked me, “What are 10 things you’ve learned so far about being married?” I asked her for a little time to think it over before I answered. This is the list I gave her:

  1. Grow in your own faith. The closer you are to God, and the more closely you follow Jesus, the better you will be at loving your spouse.
  2. Invest in your spouse’s growth. Encourage them to grow spiritually and personally. This can mean time, money, or just plain interest in what they are learning. (e.g. Sarah has taken up blogging and I have gotten her a self-hosted WordPress account, set up all the content on the site for her, and sent her to a conference to learn more about the craft. Point is, it’s important to her, so it’s important to me.)
  3. Find shared interests. Having things you can do together will always form a bond that you can enjoy together.
  4. Take some alone time. Sometimes you need to recharge your batteries away from your spouse. It’s ok. They need it too.
  5. Get physical. Remind each other that you love one another physically. Hug, kiss, touch, have sex, it all makes a big difference.
  6. Get passionate about something, something that really gets your fire burning and motivates you to do things. Set a goal and strive to achieve it together.
  7. Speak highly of one another. Whether they are around or not. The more positive things you say the less room there is for you to think negative things.
  8. Speak kindly to one another. Hurtful words can make a big (and not so pretty) difference in what your relationship looks like. Would you rather your spouse thank you for doing something or berate you for taking too long to do it? They want the same as you.
  9. Get out of town together. Remember to escape the norm once in a while. It’s easier to remember why you love one another when you aren’t doing your day in and day out routine.
  10. Protect each other. The world is always fighting against your marriage. There are any number of competing priorities every day for your attention that are not your spouse. If your wife is getting asked to do a million things, say no for her. She’ll appreciate it. Ask your husband how his day at work was. If it was stressful, find something to help him relax. Your marriage should be the place that saves you from the rest of the world. Relish it. Rest in it.
  11. *I’m adding another because I wanted to, and it’s my list. Remember the foundation of your marriage is in God. You represent Him to the world through it. You aren’t just living life. You are preaching who God is, and people are noticing.

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This post is also part of a 31 day series of Living Unplugged with The Nester. You can find the list of my other posts here.

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